My 14 year old daughter came home from her dad’s today. While there she is forced to go to his church. Honestly it’s closer to a cult. (reminder here that I’m not discussing religion or church with anyone) Her Sunday School teacher is one who was very supportive of the ex and his control over us. He was very vocal about my not having the right to leave my ex and he has been one to start and spread rumors about me, including to my teen. So not someone I’m a fan of anyway. Now my teen hates being there and resents being forced to go. So I’m sure she typically looks miserable while there. Instead of considering the possibility that it’s a miserable place to be he has made it a mission to try to force her to smile and have a good time. (because that can be forced?!? WTH?) He has given her the nickname Smiley and at this point she is feeling harassed by him. So she politely asked him not to call her that and to leave her alone. He mocked her. He told her it was cute that she thought simply asking him to stop would work. He then proposed a deal. If she smiled through all Sunday school classes, remained perfectly respectful (she is incredibly respectful, just not perfect 🙄😒😡) and didn’t spend any time on her phone between classes and services he would stop. She told him he was the one disrespecting her boundaries. He laughed at her. She told him she was not obligated to smile for him. She said he gave her an odd look. He isn’t use to women “talking back.” So I’m not surprised he didn’t know how to respond.
I’m proud of her for how she handled it. She’ll sadly have to continue to endure it. This type of behavior should anger and scare you. She has a right to her feelings. She has a right to stand up for herself and she absolutely has the right to set boundaries. There is no consent on her part and I love that she understands that. She is also not willing to buy the respect she deserves. You don’t make deals with someone just so you can feel respected. And anyone who feels that is a legitimate way to force someone to comply with your wishes is sick and potentially dangerous.
On a side note.. it shouldn’t surprise you that this man has had several DV charges against him. 2 of which the church (my inlaws) felt wasn’t justified, but understandable since the woman was known to be abrasive and push buttons. (I.E. stand up for herself) He also has an outstanding warrant in another state for DV.
Consent carries over to every aspect of our lives. If someone tells you the way you’re treating them is not ok with them… Respect that. You don’t have to agree or even understand it. And anyone trying to force ANYTHING out of you is toxic.
I follow a few blogs that are mermaid based. Drawings, paintings, artwork all. (cause you know real mermaids hate cameras)
They are all SFW. Some put in their descriptions a warning that DRAWINGS may depict nude female breasts.
I have seen hate anons get posted to them over the years because of that issue. “can’t have bare breasts while I tumblr in starbucks” Complaining instead of unfollowing.
This on artwork, like you would find in old original copies of The Little Mermaid, long before everyone Disneyfied and started selling shell bras.
I want to kiss you. I want to cuddle late at night. I want to laugh with you until I can no longer breathe. I want to make you smile at random times during the day because I’m on your mind. I want you.
Oh I am frustrated 